What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?

Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …

What is the best way to keep my vagina clean and fresh?

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

What was the first Native American tribe to inhabit Long Island, NY?

Marijuana makes Jesus cry!

Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!

Why is Eric Clapton so roundly disliked among guitarists?

Shameless vixen! Trollop!

Make Nazis afraid again!

At least until the peyote kicks in ...

Will my 9 year old face more difficulties than most girls her age if she’s an early bloomer? My daughter already needs regular B cup bras. The doctor says that my daughter will be even more developed by 11-12 years of age.

And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

What did Chandrashekhar Azad say about Hinduism during a podcast?

In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

Why should the law care about what I do behind closed doors?

TEXT:

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

Why do Republicans only believe in two genders? How do they explain Caitlin Jenner and George Santos?

But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.

After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.

Why do men cheat on their wives with someone extremely unattractive?

Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!

Would you let your partner cheat on you every now and again?

Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

How do I deal with autistic burnout/meltdown/shutdown when cooking?

I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

When I buy a house, do I automatically own all items the previous owner failed to remove from the property?

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …